评论集 | 人人都爱吐槽瓦格纳（第二弹）
新的只是黑没有粉笑话，新的快乐。很久以前的上一篇：❀
Richard Wagner, a musician who wrote music which is better than it sounds.
-- Richard Wagner
自黑：理查德·瓦格纳，一位音乐家，他写下来的音乐比听起来要好。
Wagner's music is better than it sounds.
-- Edgar Wilson Nye
瓦格纳的音乐比它听起来要好。
-- 埃德加
I have been told that Wagner's music is better than it sounds.
-- Mark Twain, Autobiography (1924)
有人告诉我，瓦格纳的音乐比听起来要好。
-- 马克·吐温《自传》(1924)
I can see Richard Wagner standing at the gates of heaven. “You have to let me in,” he says. “I wrote Parsifal. It has to do with the Grail, Christ, suffering, pity and healing. Right?” And they answer, “Well, we read it and it makes no sense. ”
-- Philip K. Dick, VALIS
我看到理查德·瓦格纳站在天堂的门口。“你必须让我进去，”他说。“我写了《帕西法尔》。它与圣杯、基督、苦难、怜悯和治愈有关。对吧? ”他们回答说：“但我们读了之后，发现它毫无意义。”
Everybody feels oppressed during a Wagner performance. That is part of the appeal.
-- Richard Taruskin, The Danger of Music and Other Anti-Utopian Essays
在瓦格纳的演出中，每个人都感到压抑。这也是吸引力的一部分。
-- Richard Taruskin，音乐的危险和其他反乌托邦论文
We needed germans in Paris to hear Wagner.
-- Marcel Proust
我们需要巴黎的德国人去听瓦格纳的音乐。
-- 普鲁斯特（当时法国有一股抵制瓦格纳的潮流）
I can't listen to that much Wagner. I start getting the urge to conquer Poland.
-- Woody Allen
我不能听那么多瓦格纳。我开始有了征服波兰的冲动。
For me Wagner is impossible... he talks without ever stopping. One can't just talk all the time.
对我来说，瓦格纳是不可能的……他说话从不停顿，一个人不能总是说个不停。
-- 舒曼
It is impossible to communicate with Schumann. The man is hopeless; he doesn't talk at all.
和舒曼交流是不可能的，这个人无可救药了，他根本不说话。
-- 瓦格纳
If one has not heard Wagner at Bayreuth, one has heard nothing! Take lots of handkerchiefs because you will cry a great deal! Also take a sedative because you will be exalted to the point of delirium!
-- Gabriel Fauré (1845-1924), letter, 1884
如果你没有在拜罗伊特听过瓦格纳，那么你就什么都没听过！多带些手帕，因为你会哭得很厉害！还要服用镇静剂，因为你会兴奋到谵妄的地步！
Wagner's art recognises only superlatives, and a superlative has no future. It is an end, and not a beginning.
-- Edward Hanslick, Hanslick's Music Criticism (1950)
瓦格纳的艺术只能认出最高级的东西，而最高级的东西是没有未来的。它是一个结束，而不是一个开始。
That kind of opera that starts at six o'clock and after it has been going three hours you look at your watch and it says 6.20.
-- David Randolph on Wagner's opera Parzifal
这种歌剧从六点开始，演了三个小时之后，你再看看表，上面显示的是六点二十分。（评论《帕西法尔》）
最后分享笑话：哪里有喷瓦格纳哪里就有李厨
